Drawings, 2004

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By 2004 almost all of my drawings were done during or were about The Little Red Studio. This was a theatrical experiment in my studio that started in 2003 but within a year took over my creative focus and time and space. It was initially supposed to be something to bring fresh ideas and people into my studio.  However, it quickly became a cross between a 3 ring circus and a nonstop parade of life.

During the “shows” I would often draw in such a way that the audience could see what I was drawing. To keep it entertaining I had to be fast. So each mark had to count. Drawings would end up on cocktail tables and people’s seats or even on the floor because as I ripped drawings off my pad I would send them into the audience. Many of them were rolled up or folded up and taken home or just swept up with the rest of the detritus at the end of the night and thrown out.

Here are a few that made it into my own archives.

“Old Man and Ghosts”
Ink/paper
Various sizes, approximately 8.5″ x 11”
2004

Pencil/paper
Various sizes, approximately 8.5″ x 11”
2004

“May Pole & Medusa”
Pencil/paper
Various sizes, approximately 8.5″ x 11”
2004

“The Princess & Her Dragon”
Pencil/paper
Various sizes, approximately 8.5″ x 11”
2004

There are fairy tales and stories about Princesses and dragons in almost every culture around the world. There must be something deep and universal about this myth.

I have since long before 2004 when I made these drawings essentially Joseph Campbellian in my approach to and understanding of myths and legends. They provide some insight into human behavior, my own most especially and my relationships.

By 2004, my marriage was unraveling with a woman that I felt had a complex and unhealthy relationship with her dragon. To me, the dragon in the castle often represented a woman’s power, or to be more precise, the power of her will and personality. If the relationship was balanced and good her dragon could protect her and slay threats and adversaries. If it was out of balance or fundamentally flawed the dragon could take over, imprison her, slay foe and friend alike and worse, even devour the princess herself.

This is what was happening with my ex wife in my view. She had never developed a healthy balanced relationship with her power and as she came into more and more through the natural unfolding of life she lost control of her dragon. It became dangerous to everyone and made no distinction between friend and enemy and eventually even turned on herself upending her career and many of her key personal relationships, ours not least among them.

I’m not suggesting that her unhealthy relationship with her inner power and temper were the sole undoing of our marriage. But it certainly contributed in a meaningful way.

I was struck by a woman who joined my Little Red Day Spa who was also struggling with her dragon. She had recently suffered the loss of her husband to suicide and was deeply questioning the role she and her power played in her husband taking his own like. My drawings never got past the more superficial levels of this complex set of concerns. But someday, maybe I will return to it.

I did learn though, that it is a young man’s folly to rush into the castle, sword raised in hopes of rescuing the princess from the dragon. As an older man I now know the dragon and the princess are more inextricably intertwined than one might think and she may not even want to be rescued. Better to take one’s time and see if the old queen has any attractive qualities worth exploring. Leave the heroics to the younger set.

“Rolf: The Commission”
Pencil/paper and Other Media
Various sizes, approximately 8.5″ x 11”
2004

“The Career, Family & Troubles With Money”
Pencil/paper
Various sizes, approximately 8.5″ x 11”
2004

This little drawing is one of thousands of small works I created and continue doing regularly. It is an exaggeration to say that I do these everyday with the same regularity as eating or reading the news. But I do them frequently and often for many days in a row. The result is a stream of conscious flow of imagery and internal associations. They are in fact very close to dream like imagery in that they are often highly symbolic and emotionally charged.

When I create them I almost never know what I will draw even when I am halfway into the drawing. And I most certainly don’t know what they mean until much later. Sometimes they become revelatory with the hindsight of many years. Furthermore, they often make more sense and are more enjoyable when seen in small groups like the ones I gathered here. They are almost like lines of poetry that might hold up well on their own as one liners but gain strength and complexity when combined into a poem. Not always.

One can make of this drawing what they will. But the symbols are clear and straightforward. A large winged cock has a cute little house perched on its erect tip. It is a picture of strength and poise. The house is the quintessence of modest cute. There is balance but things seem precarious and not meant to last. You are on your own about what this might mean.

The Career, Family, & Troubles with Money image 1
The Career, Family, & Troubles with Money image 2
The Career, Family, & Troubles with Money image 3
The Career, Family, & Troubles with Money image 4
The Career, Family, & Troubles with Money image 6

Ink/paper
8.5″ x 11”
2004

“Madison”
Paint/paper
8.5″ x 11”
2004

Madison was the stage name of one of the three women who helped me start the Little Red Studio. I have written extensively about this artistic experiment in other places on this website. What I want to focus on here is that I often did paintings and drawings on an easel to the side of the tiny stage while the show was unfolding and in a position where the audience could watch me. I worked fast. And I used the cheap water based paint that we used to paint people’s bodies during the evening.

As I finished the pieces I would pass them to the people seated next to me and encourage them to pass them along. By the end of the night many of these pieces would be on the floor or left behind on the cocktail tables. Sometimes guests would take them home and occasionally someone would feel like they just found an original Picasso under the mattress. And sometimes I would keep a few for myself. The ones I liked are like this one where there is as much a calligraphy of the mark as there is a beautiful woman. Creating them, with people watching was like a dance. Each move had to have energy and position and what dancers call “line.”

“Union”
Paint/paper
8.5″ x 11”
2004

Pencil/paper
8.5″ x 11”
2004

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